SU vs SatAM

By Shychick

Disclaimer- If I owned 'Sonic Underground', it would suck beyond all reason and all the characters, especially Sonia, would die a horrible death.

Author's Note- This fic is intended for all the loyal SatAM fans out there who hate SU, or just for anybody who hates the show in general. If you are a fan of SU, than don't read this! You have been warned!

One day, in the SU universe, Sonia the Hedgehog was riding her pink motorcycle through the streets of Robotropolis like a frickin' maniac, going over 500 miles/hour, which was way over the speed limit. As she sped through the streets like a lunatic, she was completely oblivious to the fact that she was hitting several obstacles like lamp posts, fire hydrants, and garbage cans, causing them to go flying every which way. The citizens screamed and hurried to get out of the pink freak's way before they got hit. A few people nearly did get hit. 'Why don't you watch where the fuck you're going, you crazy fucking bitch?!' screamed some old guy, angrily shaking his cane after her.

'Yeah, what the hell's your fucking problem?! You nearly killed us, you crazy freak!!!' yelled other people.

Sonia was driving so fast that she didn't even notice any of this. She was also singing Brittany Spears songs at the top of her lungs all the while. Oh, yeah, and did I mention the stupid bitch also had her eyes closed the whole time?

Sonic came dashing up along side of her. 'Hey, sis, get offa the road! Dontcha know that I'm supposed to be the Fastest Thing Alive around here?' he yelled, as he tried to run her off the road. 'Nobody shows up this hedgehog and gets away with it, sister!' He curled up into a ball and Spin- Dashed her, sending her and her stupid fucking pink cycle flying into the air. 'Looks like I'm blasting off again!' the dumb bitch screamed in her annoying, high-pitched Steve Eurkel voice.

Sonia landed head-first in a Dumpster. She started to swim around in the stinking heap of trash, doing the Back Stroke in the shit. 'Hey, this place rocks! I think I'll live in here for the rest of my life!' she cried as she happily threw chunks of garbage into the air. A stray dog came along and started to eat at some of the garbage. This pissed Sonia off royally- literally, seeing as how she's supposed to be a princess or something. 'Hey, you stupid shit-eating mongrel, get the hell away from my house! You're trespassing on private property!' Sonia screamed, as she started flinging empty old cans at the dog. The dog just stared at her for a few seconds, probably thinking what a stupid retarded bitch she was, before lifting it's leg and taking a piss right in her face. Than the dog calmly walked off.

Suddenly Oscar the Grouch popped up from the garbage can beside her, holding a shotgun. 'All right, you stupid bitch, you have ten seconds to get your worthless pink ass the fuck off my turf before I open fire!' he yelled, pointing to all the signs which read 'Fuck off!' and 'No vacancy!' and 'Trespassers will be shot'. Sonia just looked at Oscar and said 'Hey, you remind me of my brother, Manic! You're both green!' The Grouch just rolled his eyes and tried to shoot her in the chest, but unfortunately his gun wasn't loaded. 'Shit! Outta ammo!' He roughly shoved her out of the Dumpster and disappeared back inside of his trash can, slamming the lid shut.

Sonia bounced onto the hard pavement and landed on her ass. 'Oh, my God! I broke a nail!' she screeched in her horrible voice like a vampire bat. Than she decided to go look for Manic and Sonic.

* * *

Meanwhile down in the local bar, Sonic and Manic were busy entertaining all the winos by singing one of their retarded songs up on stage. Sleet and Dingo, who were completely drunk off their asses, were booing and hissing viciously while throwing broken bear bottles at the stage, towards the two hedgehogs. 'Get off of the stage, you stupid blokes!' Dingo roared. 'Yes, please spare us, we beg of you!' Sleet cried, beating his poor drunken head against the bar counter.

'Shut your cake hole, Ding-bat!' Sonic said, dodging the bear bottles. 'You too, Sleet-head! Just thank your lucky stars that our sister, Sonia, isn't here singing along with us!'

'Whoa, dude, the crowd's getting' mondo ugly,' Manic said, as he paused right in the middle of his drum solo. 'What are gonna do?'

Just than, Sonia burst through the door like a tornado, using her Sonia- Spin. Since she was still covered from head to toe in garbage, it went flying all over everybody in the bar. 'Don't worry, guys! It's all cool now!' she screamed. 'Sonia's here to save the day!' She transformed her medallion into her keyboard. 'LET'S JAM!' she cried. 'One, two, three, hit it!' Sonia started singing 'Hit me Baby, One more Time' at the top of her loud, screechy voice, singing terribly off key, all the while playing her keyboard off key as well. The crowd all began to cover their ears and boo louder than ever, while chucking several bear bottles, darts, knives, tomatoes, and other shit at the stage.

'Sonia, what the hell are you trying to do, get us killed?' Sonic yelled over the angry, roaring crowd. 'God, we shoulda kicked you outta the group a long time ago!'

Just than, Dingo stood up with a handful of knives. 'All right, mates, let 'em 'ave it!' he roared. The crowd all began to charge the stage.

'Whoa! We better juice!' Sonic cried. The trio ran like hell, fleeing the bar. The angry mob chased after them, screaming bloody murder. Sleet made Dingo transform into a motorcycle, hopped on, and raced after them. 'Get those miserable hedgehogs!' he shouted.

Sonic, Manic, and Sonia hid in an alley until the mob went running past them. When the coast was clear, they slowly emerged from their hiding place. 'It's cool,' Sonic said. 'Now, let's continue our search for Mom!'

Just than, a holographic image of Queen Relena appeared before them. 'You three have deeply disappointed me,' she said to them. 'I leave the fate of Mobius in your hands and what do you spend all your time doing? Singing ridiculous rock songs like a bunch of damn punks, when you should be saving the planet! What kind of behavior is that for children of royal blood? And the punk-style way you and Sonia dress!' she added to Manic and Sonia. 'And the tasteless, punk-style way you two wear your hair/quills! At least Sonic has the good taste to wear his quills normal, even if he does wear no clothing at all!'

'Ha! I knew Mom liked me the best!' Sonic grinned smugly, sticking his tongue out at his siblings.

'Don't get cheeky with me, young man, you're still out of the will too!' Queen Relina snapped. 'For your disgraceful behavior, I hereby disown all three of you! You three are no longer entitled to be the future rulers of Mobius! I thought that I could die in peace, knowing that my three brave children would be good rulers of the planet in my place, but you'd probably just spend all your time giving damn rock concerts and rocking the palace off it's fucking foundation with your so-called music every night until the fucking break of dawn!!!' She raised a finger into the air. 'Let it be known'that from this day forward' I HAVE NO CHILDREN!!!' She than vanished.

Sonia ran off into the distance, crying like the retard that she is. 'WHAAA!!! Now I'll never be the Queen!' she screamed. Manic ran after her, screaming something about suicide.

Sonic just shrugged. 'Oh, well. I don't really care. I mean, I'm Sonic the Hedgehog! I was never meant to have siblings, be a prince, carry around a guitar, and sing crappy songs all the time in the first place! That ain't the kind of stuff this Hedgehog does! This whole crappy show totally makes me look bad! It's a mondo disgrace to my good name! And it's about time we put a stop to it, once-and-for-all!' He suddenly yelled, 'LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!', and all of a sudden the cast of the SatAM series came charging up, bearing pitchforks, torches, and clubs.

'There's room for only one princess in the entire StH Universe, missy!' Sally yelled, as she started beating the crap out of Sonia.

Suddenly Amy Rose from the SA game came up and joined Sally. 'And there's only room for one pink hedgehog in the StH Universe too!' she shouted, as she started beating Sonia up with her giant hammer.

Tails used his two tails to choke Manic to death. 'It's not fair! How come I wasn't even included in this series? Everyone knows me and Sonic just go together like cookies and milk, from all the video games, to SatAM, to the AoStH series! You just can't have Sonic without Tails!' He tightened his grip around Manic's neck. 'And Sonic's one-and-only 'bro' in the whole StH Universe is ME! So there!'

King Maximilian Acorn started beating on Queen Relina with his scepter. 'There is only room for one monarch of Mobius, you vile wench!' he roared. 'Let's see how YOU enjoy being trapped in the Void forever!' Ixis Nagaus used his magic to teleport the Queen into the depths of the Void for all eternity. 'SEE YA, 'MOM'! Sonic yelled, as he slapped a high-five with his real mother, Julie-Su.

Just than, Robotnik, Dingo, and Sleet came down the street to see what all the commotion was about.

'GET THEM TOO!' everybody shouted. Everybody charged up and started attacking them as well.

Packbell used his mighty robotic strength to crush the likes of Sleet and Dingo, while Snively blasted Robotnik to smithereens with his laser pistol. 'This is for always treating me like shit and never giving me any fucking credit, Julian!' he screamed.

After a while, nothing was left of the entire cast of 'Sonic Underground'. Everybody cheered happily and a huge party broke out.

'Zat was better zen ze French Revolution!' Antoine declared.

'You can say that again, Ant!' Sonic grinned, as he munched on a chili dog. 'We defeated Robuttnik and killed 'Sonic Underground' all in one day. That's a record!'

Sally walked up to Sonic and embraced him with a kiss. 'Sonic Hedgehog, you're my hero,' she said. The two shared a very passionate kiss together, while everybody stood around them, clapping and cheering.

THE END!

And the moral of the story is- SU needs to be banned off of television forever, Sonia just sucks, Snively should get a huge raise and a promotion, Sonic and Sally should get married, and no matter what' DIC Entertainment should produce the long-awaited third season of SatAM.

I realize that this story is a bit crazy, for lack of a better word. Please bear in mind that I was VERY hyper when I wrote this, okay? Please don't flame me. I am sorry if I offended any SU fans out there, but I'm just voicing my opinions! Don't take this story seriously, okay? And if you MUST flame me, please be tasteful about it, okay? Thanx!

This has been a Shychick Production!