Disclaimer- I only own the SatAM DVD and a few issues of the comic. Cool? Cool.

A/N- LEZZ DO DIS THANG, ALREA-DAY!!

It was a Monday morning. Robotnik was down in his Control Room, as usual, sitting on his fat tub-of-lard ass, as usual, impatiently drumming his fingers against the arm-rest of his personal chair... as usual. He was particulary impatient this morning because he had been expecting Snively for some time now. It was not like Snively to be late for a shift, especially because he knew the state of his well-being depened greatly on his promptness and puncuality. So Robotnik decided to walk his fat ass on over to the monitors and see just what his incompetant nephew was up to. He pushed a button on the console, allowing him to get a glimpse of the interior of Snively’s bedroom. Much to his surprise, he saw that he was still in bed! And it was already 7:00, fifteen fucking minutes after Snively was supposed to start his usual morning shift.

Robotnik grabbed ahold of the mic. Oh, so his nephew thought he could away with sleeping in on his time, did he? Well, he had news for the lazy little fucker. “ALL RIGHT, SLEEPING BEAUTY!” he roared into the mic, “RISE AND SHINE!”

This rude awakening caused the little man to spring high into the air in fright, crashing into his ceiling and leaving an imprint. He slowly crumpled back down to his bed. “S-sir?” he replied nervously.

“Snively! If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times- MY TIME IS PRECIOUS! QUIT MAKING ME WASTE IT BY WAITING AROUND FOR YOUR LAZY LITTLE ASS ALL DAY!” his uncle’s voice screamed through the intercom, adding to poor Snively’s headache.

“I’m very sorry, sir,” began Snively, his voice oddly sounding even more nasel then usual. “But I’m afraid I can’t go to work today. You see, I’ve come down with a terrible cold. Ah-ah-ah-ah-CHOOO!” With that, he sneezed a mighty sneeze that sent him rocketing back up onto the ceiling. He fell back down onto his bed. “You see, sir?” he groaned. “I’ve come down with something awful. I can’t stop sneezing and coughing, I’ve got the sniffles, I ache all over, and I’m so dreadfully cold! I fear I shall have to be confined to bed for the rest of the day, sir. It simply can’t be helped.” Piled high atop of his night-table beside him were several Kleenex boxes, containers of Vic’s VapoRub, bottles of cough syrup, and bottles of cold pills and painkillers. Perched atop his forehead was a hot-water heater.

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling so under the weather this morning, Snively,” Robotnik cooed in a tone of mock-sympathy. He suddenly rose his voice. “Now get dressed and get your ass down here, chop-chop! I’m tired of this crap!”

Snively sighed. Was his uncle deaf, as well as stupid? “I feel like complete shit, sir, I can’t go anywhere,” he said with a slight edge to his voice. “Er, pardon my French, sir!” he quickly added.

“Snively,” Robotnik said in an eerily-calm voice, “if I do not see you down here to report for duty in ten minutes, then you will be leave me no choice but to come and fetch you myself. And believe me, nephew, you do not want that at all.”

Snively left out a painful sigh. His uncle showed him no mercy, reason, or sympathy, not even when he was sick. “Yes, sir, as you wish,” he sighed. The intercom system clicked off.

Snively moaned and burried his face into his pillow. What was he going to do now? Well, he supposed that suffering his uncle’s wrath would be far worse then dealing with a mere cold...

Suddenly, Snively got a brililant idea as a cartoonish lightbulb suddenly appeared above his head. Without bothering to get dressed, he threw his bathrobe and slippers on, and rushed down to Robotnik’s lab., which was located on the second floor, next to the Robotization Room. He recalled that time when him and Robotnik had created that android duplicate of Princess Sally to spy on the Freedom Fighters in Knothole, and had programmed it with the Princess’s own personality. (A/N: SatAM episode, Sonic and Sally). Well, Snively would design and create a robot duplicate of himself! And he would, of course, program it with his personality and voice. This android clone of his would take his place for him today, while he would get the much-deserved rest he needed. It was perfect! The Big Round Guy wouldn’t know the difference... and besides, what he didn’t know couldn’t hurt him, right? Right...

Half-an-hour later, the metal duplicate of himself was ready, and was standing inside a glass tube. Snively approached it with a disk that contained enough memory to duplicate human complexity, and installed it in the back of the robot. Then he walked over to the empty glass tube beside the other one and enclosed himself inside it. “Ah, this does bring back fond memories indeed...” Snively snickered sarcastically. “Those were the days,” he sang to the opening theme from All in the Family. Too bad he didn’t have a piano. Anyhoo, Snively then turned to the SWATBot standing over at the console pannel, ready to comply. “Activate Exterior-Duplication Sequence!” he ordered.

The SWAT bushed a button and, in a matter of a second, an exact replica of Snively (at least his outer form) appeared there. All it’s physical/outer features, including his green uniform, matched Snively’s perfectly.

Snively smiled at his clone. “Mmm... handsome devil, if I do say so myself,” he mused, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. The SWAT pushed another button on the console, activating the robot. “If I do say so myself,” the robot repeated in Snively’s exact tone and voice.

Snively rubbed his fingers together like Mr. Burns. “Excellent.” He turned to the SWATBot. “Now, begin Personality-Duplication Sequence!” The SWATBot obeyed, and suddenly, a thin circle of florescent-pink light rose down in the glass tubes and centered around both Snively and the Robot-Snively’s heads...

LATER...

Down in the Control Room, Robotnik was just about to send a whole team of SWATs out to search the base for Snively, since he had not found him in his room when his time was up. But then Snively (or so Robotnik thought it was, but you, me, and the real Snively know otherwise, don’t we? Raises finger to mouth Shhh!) approached his throne from behind, on the metal balcony. “Greetings, Dr. Robotnik, sir,” he said in that usual dull monotone of Snively’s, wearing his usual dull expression. “Forgive me for having kept your Ovalness waiting, but I just found it so difficult to get out of bed. This cold is really decreasing my energy, sir.”

Robotnik growled impatiently. “Very well, Snively. At least you’re here now, that’s all I care about.” He pointed a metal finger at Robot-Snively. “But be warned- next time, I not be so lenient with you. Now get your ass over to the monitors before I decide to fling you over that balcony.”

“Er, yes, sir, of course, sir,” Robot-Snively stammered. He walked over to the monitors.

Meanwhile, down in his bedroom, Snively was eavesdropping via his intercom system on Robotnik and his mechanical clone to see if everything was going to plan, just in case. He had the foresight to install a tiny communication device behind the robot’s left ear so that he could listen in on it wherever it went. “Excellent,” Snively grinned, rubbing his hands together. “It’s all going perfectly to plan. The Big Round Guy doesn’t suspect a thing! He can’t tell that it’s a mere robot version of myself. It’s the spitting image/personality of me, if I do say so myself...” he added, casually glancing at his nails. “But, good gods, do I really sound like that?” he added with a shudder. “Hmm, no wonder I’m always getting made fun of for my voice.” He grinned. “Well, since everything’s running smooth as clockwork so far, I think it’s safe to finally get some much-deserved rest.” Chuckling, he got into bed and pulled the covers over himself. “Oh, I can’t believe how easily I’m getting away with deceiving that old fool!” he said gleefully. He broke out into his hysterical high-pitched laugh, and ended up having a major coughing fit as a result. “Ow, my throat,” he whined.

A MediBot (Medical-Bot) approached him with a spoonful of cough syrup. “SAY “AH”, SIR,” the MediBot droned.

Snively glared at the ‘Bot. “That isn’t how you do it! Give me that!” he snapped, grabbing the entire bottle of cough syrup and downing the whole thing all at once. Suddenly, he sprayed out the whole mouthful in disgust. “What the bloody hell?” he cried, staring at the label of the bottle in horror. “This is Buckley’s Cough Syrup, you incompetent tin-can! Are you trying to poison me?!” He threw the bottle in the MediBot’s face. “You know I specifically requested cherry-flavored!”

“SIR, THERE IS NO MORE CHERRY-FLAVORED. ONLY BUCKLEY’S.”

“What?!” Snively started throwing a giant tantrum. “But I specifically ordered you to stock up on extra cherry-flavored cough syrup! I absolutely REFUSE to swallow any of that nasty-tasting rubbish!” He growled. “Now, see what you’ve done? All this yelling has increased my throat-ache!” He reached over on his night-table, grabbed a jar of honey, and downed the whole jar. (A/N- Honey really does help when you have a sore throat!) “Ah, that’s much better... for the time being, at least.” He turned to the MediBot. “Now then, make yourself useful and bring me some hot chicken soup and orange juice!”

“COMPLIANCE,” droned the MediBot, exiting the room. About fifteen minutes later, it returned with a tray of chicken soup and orange juice.

Snively licked his lips and eagerly rubbed his hands together. “Ah, there’s nothing like freshly-squeezed orange juice and home-made chicken soup... just like Mother used to make,” he said hungrily.

9:00 AM...

“Blast it all! These tissues are like sand-paper against my nose! MEDIBOT! I told you, be sure to replace the tissues with those soft ones I like! IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!”

9:30 AM...

“Now I know why I’m so wretchedly uncomfortable! My pillow is too flat! MEDIBOT! Come over here and fluff my pillow at once!”

10:00 AM...

“Brrr! I’ve got a terrible case of the chills! MEDIBOT! Bring me some extra blankets, and while you’re at it, another round of soup!”

10:30 AM...

“Oh, my head keeps pounding like a bloody jack-hammer! MEDIBOT! I’m all out of asprin! Fetch me some more!”

11:00 AM...

“MEDIBOT! This bed-pan isn’t just going to empty itself out, you know!”

11:30 AM...

“MEDIBOT! Fetch me my teddy, Shnookums!”

12:00 PM...

“MEDIBOT! Come over here and take my temperature at once!”

Meanwhile, down in the Control Room, Robot-Snively had just completed a report on StealthBot productivity. “Here is the report on current StealthBot productivity you requested, sir,” he said.

“Excellent, Snively,” Robotnik said, grabbing the paper. “Now then, have you finished reviewing last night’s security tapes today, like I asked of you last night?”

Robot-Snively looked somewhat confused. Snively had forgotten to program it with his memory of any past events and assignments, so it wasn’t sure what Robotnik was talking about. “Er... no, sir, I, um, seem to have forgotten,” it stammered.

“You WHAT?! You fool! How could you have forgotten such an important thing! I reminded you right before you ended your shift the night before! THE HEDGEHOG AND THOSE FREEDOM FIGHTERS COULD HAVE BEEN UP TO THEIR OLD TRICKS LAST NIGHT! Does that mean nothing to you?!” Robotnik yelled, grabbing him by the shirt.

“Miserable slave-driver,” Robot-Snively muttered under it’s breath, Snively’s hate for his uncle coming out in it’s programmed personality.

“WHAT WAS THAT?!” Robotnik bellowed.

“Yes, you heard me. If I were you, Julian, I would walk my fat ass straight into on-coming traffic, you bloated old toad!” Robot-Snively snapped. It would appear that there was a slight glitch in the Personality Module, as Snively would only mutter insults and comments about Robotnik behind his back- but would never dare to actually say them right to his face!

Robotnik roared in anger and sent Robot-Snively flying across the room like a football. It crashed hard into the wall.

Meanwhile, Snively had overheard all this through his intercom system. He knew that Robotnik must have reacted violently, for the communication system had suddenly turned to static, meaning that the device behind the robot’s ear which allowed Snively to hear everything had been damaged. “No, no, no, NO!” Snively cried, knocking over his water glass on his night-table in frustration. “You fool, you’ve come and spoiled everything!” He moaned. “I’m ruined! Now that the cat’s out of the bag, I’ll never live this down! What am I going to do now?!” he cried, collapsing down backwards onto his bed and smushing his pillow over both sides of his face. “Oh, I’d hate to be in my robotic clone’s shoes right now...” he groaned. He suddenly bolted back up as he realized something. “Oh, no... by the time he gets through with my robotic self, it’ll be nothing but a pile of scrap!It won’t be long until Robotnik realizes that it’s a mere duplicate! And then...” he put a hand to his mouth and gasped. “He’ll realize that he’s been duped!” He moaned loudly and pulled the covers over his head. “Oh, what a mess! How am I ever going to explain this to him? When he’s with finished with me, I’ll be in no greater shape then my mechanical double!”

All of a sudden, the automatic doorway to Snively’s bedroom whooshed open. A very pissed-off Robotnik stood there, angrily hyperventilating. In his hand, he held the dismantled head of Robot-Snively. “What... is the meaning of this, Snively?” he growled. “I trust you have a very good explanation...” He thundered over to his nephew’s bed, who was cowering under the covers, and yanked him out. “You have precisely ten seconds to explain yourself before you join your twin here!”

Snively let out a squeak of terror. “Sir,” he gasped out, “I- I did it for you! I didn’t want you to catch my terrible cold, so I created a robot double of myself to fill in for me on a temporary basis so you wouldn’t become exposed to my germs!”

“Is that so?” Robotnik said calmly. “Then perhaps you can explain just what the blasted thing meant by those certain interesting little comments it made to my face!” The grip around his lackey’s throat tightened.

Snively gulped and put a hand to his forehead. “Oh, I don’t feel so good,” he moaned.

THE END!

This has been a Shychick Production!